May 2013
heartless:
It’s annoying when you are fucking fed up with someone’s shit but you don’t want to start something so you have to pretend like you don’t care
buttsdotcom:
I need to lose 30 pounds in today
a-study-in-gay:
gabul0sis:
like i don’t party i don’t do drugs i’m not pregnant i don’t worship satan or anything and all i do is get yelled at for stupid shit like leaving a fork in the sink
who wrote the story of my life
drarna:
REALLY PISSES ME OFF WHEN YOU CATCH YOUR PARENTS GOSSIPING ABOUT YOU TO FAMILY MEMBERS LIKE TALK SHIT GET HIT BITCH
April 2013
trillow:
[police officer] “sir are you in possession of any illegal drugs”
“sure thing son whatchu need”
yazzdonut:
deoxyribonucleic—acid:
you see this is exactly why i have a huge fucking problem with the new cartoon
cjhatesboredom:
meanwhile in twitter…
moments later…
me: i'll do it in five minutes
me: shit, it's been an hour already?
me: i'll do it in five minutes
white dad in any movie: but son, you're throwing away your DREAM
white son in any movie: no dad, I'm throwing away ~yours~
internetexplorers:
errorsanitynotfound:
internetexplorers:
why hasn’t anyone offered my parents 5 camels for my hand in marriage yet what am i doing wrong
its because you are worth at least 10 camels and they just cant afford you
this is the nicest thing anyone’s ever said to me
